Freedom

I interned in the Philippines as a case manager for a refugee-protection agency. One of my favorite clients was preparing to leave for Canada. As I sat in the taxi with him, after finalizing his documents at the Bureau of Immigration, he expressed his nervousness to me. He was a very wealthy man. He owned several businesses and made more than enough to send both his girls, aged under 10, to international schools. He lived more than comfortably in the Philippines. So I asked him, "Then why are you choosing to leave?"

My question was very naive, but I was really curious, because I could never understand the true experience of not having any political rights as a privileged American citizen. Many people are just numbers, but he was stateless, meaning he wasn't really even alive. Of course, he wanted to go to have political rights.

He did mention, though, that although his friends told him how great Canada is, he wasn't sure for himself, because he has never been there. Therefore, how would he know if life there is actually "better," and really, that experience and definition is subjective. He had to go though. He had to make it to his final destination.....

but how did he know that Canada is forever his final destination? Is freedom bounded by borders? I don't think so....

Honestly, I don't know how to write anymore, so I'm going to stop trying to.


Goodbye.

Familiarity...?

I am home and have been since Sunday night. My flight was unexpectedly short. I couldn't help but engulf myself in my experiences for the past 6 months while purchasing my plane ticket back home. I wasn't supposed to go home yet. I'm not sure if I wanted to go home yet. But yes, here I am now.

It feels like I have been gone for years, and everyone is different. Or maybe, I'm the one who has drastically changed?

I am really sad.

Man...

I have definitely been devastated and hurt by others, but I have never felt so torn inside like this. The shittiest part is that I know whatever I decide, I will have some sort of regret.

*I really miss June Lee right now.

Really, Mr.President?

From President Obama's Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech:

“The United States of America has helped underwrite global security for more than six decades with the blood of our citizens and the strength of our arms.”

Please be honest with me. Was/is it always for global security or American security? That was a very American-centric (not even Eurocentric) statement that was made on America's behalf. Thanks.

My identity here:

*FYI: in Vietnam, you speak of the order that someone is in within the sibling hierarchy and then their first name when identifying people. There are also different terms for the maternal and paternal side.

Maternal:
-Ngoai: grandparent(s)
-Di: Aunt
-Cau: Uncle
-Mo: Aunt in-law

Paternal:
-Noi: grandparent(s)
-Co: Aunt
-Bac/Chu: Uncle
-Thiem: Aunt in-law


Here, this is how I introduce myself to people:

Chau = granddaughter/niece

1. Chau ngoai of Hai Nhat (2 Nhat) or chau noi of Chin Nghi (9 Nghi)
2. Chau of Ba Phi (3 Phi)
3. Chau Duong 6/Phuc sua xe (Uncle in-law 6 named Phuc who is a mechanic)
4. Con Tu Niem/Huynh Anh (daughter of 4 Niem or Huynh Anh)

Yup, I never introduce my name, because it doesn't matter.

The Past Few Days

This is what I've been doing here:

1. Eat
2. Sleep
3. Chase chickens out the house
4. Clean up chicken poo
5. Chase kittens out the front yard
6. Watch a ridiculous fight in front of the hospital, which is across the street, between a dumb ass man and a woman. FYI the woman won
7. Get ripped off when I go to the market and buy fruits
8. Watch my uncle and Fruit Loops fish. I just stood there with the bucket. Basically my uncle had spread a net across the lake and pulled the fishes out the net when they got caught. Then he threw them onto land. Fruit Loops fetched the fishes, lol, and then threw it into the bucket, which I held. IT WAS FUN!

I am quite surprised I haven't gotten many mosquito bites.
Going to eat AUTHENTIC bun nuoc leo tomorrow, although I should. WHATEVER!

Today's Ride

I met up with my little baby cousin, who is 17 years old, for dinner today. I took a moto-taxi to the place. I asked the driver to take me to Kem Bach Dang, which is an ice-cream parlor. In the middle of the ride, I told the driver that I didn't know if I would have a body to eat ice-cream with by the time I get to there, as in, the drive was so crazy, I literally thought I was going to DIE!

My cousin and I had a really good dinner. We went to Sushi Bar, which was a crowded place, so it was fun to people-watch. And, I learned a lot about my cousin. When the bill came, he wanted to pay, because he was "the man." Needless to say, my response was, "First of all, I am older than you, and secondly, DO YOU WANT ME TO SLAP YOU?!" The waiter came. I paid, but she asked me for another bill, because it was ripped. My cousin gave her his money instead. I pretty much stared her down and told her to give it back to him. She was really nice about it.

Then, my baby cousin insisted that I take the taxi home, instead of the moto-taxi, because I am a girl, and it's safer that way. And yes, I took his advice.

Conclusion: my baby cousin ain't no baby anymore!

Please

Meet me half way...